The Bulldozer

There is a blizzard today. It's nice because it gives me an excuse to not work, it gives me a day off.

But it's heartbreaking too...because Cedric loved the snow so much.

I look out and I see the untouched snow, and I imagine his little paw prints making little paths everywhere. I imagine him putting his nose down, and bulldozing his own path...then looking up and having a neat little pile of snow on top of his nose right between his eyes. How he loved the snow.

The quiet house is another painful reminder. The sound of him breathing is missing. He's not nesting into his beanbag or drinking gallons of water. No long protruded sighs...no snoring.

Some people will say--oh, he was just a dog. Cedric was much more than that. He was a very special part of our family, like glue a lot of the time. No matter what happened, we all worried about Cedric and we all loved him so.

Cedric was my brother, and my friend. I had a tough time through junior high and high school, and Cedric was always there when I came home from school. He would listen to me, and in the mornings would even crawl into bed with me and help me procrastinate. I never had to spend a night alone because he was there. When I was down because other girls had dates and valentines, I had Cedric...and I knew he would never break my heart.

As I said yesterday...paw prints on my heart. Only today they are filled with snow.