Being Sick...

I hate being sick...or even just feeling sick.

I have been fighting something ever since we came back from Utah. I think at first it was just that my body got way too dry--my throat, lungs and sinuses were bone dry--and now my body is still recovering from all of that.

But I have never done at letting anyone take care of me, not even whilst I was sick. So other than last year when my Dad drove all the way out to my apartment to bring me a humidifier...twice, I can't really remember a time since childhood that I have been cared for whilst sick.

I don't like the feeling...not just the physicality of being sick, where I am tired and completely drained; but also the mental aspect of trying to push through it all alone.

I am learning to lean on others...learning to trust still.

I'll get there...little by little...

30...

Today is my ex's birthday.

He turns 30.

He was slightly terrified of leaving his twenties...even 2 years ago.

I wonder how he is doing today...but I don't really care that much.

His continued lies have made my life more difficult, so I can only hope that he will get the help that he needs so that he no longer has to lash out at me.

Happy Birthday...to you.

Missing the Desert....

After being back from Utah for a while, I am starting to realize just how much I miss the desert.

I was born and raised in the desert, I feel so very much at home there. Not to say that I don't feel at home here in Colorado, but the desert has always been a place I feel soothes and warms my heart and soul.

It has been too long since I have been to the desert...and too long since I have been back to my home desert....I can't wait to go back...soon, I hope.

Back to Reality...

Oh how odd it is to be back in civilization...

How strange it is to be back in a schedule...

How fast it all went.

I am definitely ready to go back...next time I will have to try to plan for a few more days.

But for now...back to reality...

Waking Up...

This morning we woke up to cold...cold cold cold...but also to the sun shining through the aspens...it was breathtaking.

At our new camping spot, we could have a fire--so of course we made fire. And by "we," I mean that Ryan got up early and started a fire. It was lovely.

It was really refreshing to just sit and take time for breakfast. To be able to sit and chat, take the time to enjoy the morning. I wonder if this would work back home...

A Day Early...

Today we opted to hike out of the canyon a day early, so we could find a new camp somewhere along the route back home. We ended up camping a couple hours away from Escalante, just somewhere off the side of the road in the midst of a beautiful little forest.

The aspens were a bright yellow...and despite the deer legs and various bones...it was still a lovely adventure....

All too soon...it'll be over..

Bare feet...

Given our frequent encounters with quicksand yesterday, we decided we might fare better today if we hiked barefoot. We would definitely save a lot of time not having to rinse our shoes out every bend or so!

It was a wonderful feeling...the mud and sand between my toes...and it was also wonderful to feel so separated from the rest of the world. Despite running into another group, it still felt like we three were the only people on the planet for a while...

It was so nice to get away from society. To be away from obligations, bank accounts, schedules and watches...

Society

By Eddie Vedder

It's a mystery to me,

We have a greed,

With which we have agreed.

You think you have to want

More than you need.

Until you have it all you won't be free.

Society, you're a crazy breed.

I hope you're not lonely

Without me.

When you want more than you have

You think you need.

And when you think more than you want

Your thoughts begin to bleed.

I think I need to find a bigger place,

'Cause when you have more thank you think

You need more space.

Society, you're a crazy breed.

I hope you're not lonely

Without me.

Society,

Crazy and deep,

I hope you're not lonely

Without me.

There those thinking more or less, less is more.

But if less is more, how you keeping score?

Means for every point you make

Your level drops.

Kinda like starting from the top.

You can't do that...

Society, you're a crazy breed.

I hope you're not lonely

Without me.

Society,

Crazy and deep,

I hope you're not lonely

Without me.

Society, have mercy on me.

I hope you're not angry

If I disagree.

Society,

Crazy and deep,

I hope you're not lonely

Without me.

______________________________

I don't think society is lonely without me...and I am not lonely without all of it...

Backpacking...

Today was my first day of backpacking...ever.

After an all-nighter driving--through a lot of rain and the remnants of a flash flood, we made it to the trailhead! It was a little touch and go there for a bit, with the Jeep surfing though what should have been a road...but after a few miles driving on the side of the road, it was all clear!

It was simply lovely, despite all the time we spent clearing mud out of our shoes after a multitude of encounters with quicksand. The scenery was lovely, and reminded me very much of Arizona.

(I am going to do one long blog post detailing the entire trip, so I won't go into too much detail now...)

But it was great to feel my body working. To see all that it can do, to think all that it could do. I was very impressed with how I faired, given that I had so little prep for this adventure!

It was a wonderful day spent with Ryan--it will be great to get to spend so much time with him! We haven't ever gotten to spend so much time together!! And it was great to have our friend Brian along--many thanks to Austyn for letting us steal him away from her for so long!!

I can't remember the last time I felt so exhausted...and fell asleep so early...

SURPRISE!!!

I have been so excited for Ryan to find out about our surprise trip to Utah!! I told him that we were joining my family for a trip to Arizona, but secretly was planning a backpacking trip to Utah as a birthday present.

It was well worth the wait...the look on his face was priceless, and he was speechless!!

There was lots to talk about on the all-night drive to Utah!

Busy, Busy, Busy...

I am sorry for the sparseness of writing lately...I have been so busy with so much lately...

I promise I will have more to write about very soon. And hopefully more time as well.

Whistle While You Work...

It is nice to have a more steady job again. It is odd to have multiple jobs though...that I am still adjusting to!

I am enjoying what I am doing--for the most part. I have decided to let the childcare worker job go, as it is not something I am enjoying.

"Do what you love, the rest will follow..."

I am going to keep trying to do just that.

Sunshine...

Thank God the sun is out today...I am not ready for winter...not at all.

Every day the sun hides, it reminds me how difficult the months to come with be...and I would like to postpone all of that as long as possible.

So for today, I am going to bask in the glow of a new sunny day!!

Cold...

It is cold.

It is dark.

I feel it...so thoroughly.

So empty.

So devoid.

So alone.

At least I know I have a hand to hold...

A hand that will hold mine...

When I have no energy to reach out...

When I have forgotten that I can reach out.

The Book of Love

by Peter Gabriel
(originally by The Magnetic Fields)

The book of love is long and boring,
No one can lift the damn thing.
It's full of charts and facts and figures,
And instructions for dancing.

But I....
I love it when you read to me.
And you...
You can read me anything.

The book of love has music in it.
In fact that's where music comes from.
Some of it is just transcendental,
Some of it is just really dumb.

But I...
I love it when you sing to me.
And you...
You can sing me anything.

The book of love is long and boring,
And written very long ago.
It's fill of flowers and heart-shaped boxes,
And things we're all too young to know.

But I...
I love it when you give me things.
And you...
You ought to give me wedding rings.
And I...
I love it when you give me things.
And you...
You ought to give me wedding rings.
And I...
I love it when you give me things.
And you...
You ought to give me wedding rings.
You ought to give me wedding rings.
__________________________________

This is the song at the end of the last episode of Scrubs, and I totally fell in love with this song the first time I heard it.

I like how it's sweet, but realistic. I mean, come on--"no one can lift the damn thing??" Awesome.

It's a beautiful reminder that we each have our own book of love, and we get to decide which music is in it, and which is just "really dumb."

And some things, we will always be too young to know.

But I know enough to keep reading...

Battles

by The Spill Canvas

Cursed by my imagination,
Teaming with echoes of situations,
I do not feel well, pressed beneath this spell.
Polishing my social skills
With one more drink, and two more pills.
I do not feel good, I thought by now I would.

But then again,
It's like one thousand paper cuts,
Soaked in vinegar.
Like the battles with yourself,
That leave you insecure.
It's all just a numbing charade,
Until the day you finally wake up,
And you're not afraid.

Bound by my own disposition,
The endless hunt to find fruition.
I'm insatiable, even if my cup is full.
My sore throats are now routine...
I've got to write those songs, make 'em scream.
They're insatiable, even if their ears are full.

But then again,
It's like one thousand paper cuts,
Soaked in vinegar.
Like the battles with yourself,
That leave you insecure.
It's all just a numbing charade,
Until the day you finally wake up,
And you're not...afraid.

But then again,
It's like one thousand paper cuts,
Soaked in vinegar.
Like the battles with yourself,
That leave you insecure.
It's all just a numbing charade,
Until the day you finally wake up,
And you're not afraid.
________________________

I have been battling myself for a while...yet again. You all know by now that there is some stuff I have been wanting to put out here on my blog, but I have been hesitant...

I have been in therapy since a few weeks after I left my ex. I have been with my current therapist for a year now, and I think it has been super helpful. I try and go once a week, granted I have the time. Yesterday was a good session...

I talked about all the stuff that has been weighing me down and why I feel hesitant about putting everything out there on this little page. I feel as though I reached a resolution...and I am no longer afraid.

It's been like one thousand paper cuts...doused in vinegar. Even those evil paper cuts right between your fingers...and the pain was excruciating, and so I went numb--in a lot of ways.

I am still learning to wake up and feel everything again. I am still learning to express it all as well. I have found my voice again--and sometimes I need a reminder to use it.

There will always be battles within. But today, I won one.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

Today is my Grandma's birthday!!

Most of you know just how much my Grandma has meant to me over the years--she has been my role model and my best friend. I do hope that someday soon we can live closer so we can see each other much more often.

Happy Birthday Grandma!! I love you so very much!! I hope your day is wonderful!!

Do Better

by Say Anything

Life is not a spark in space,
an episode of Will and Grace,
Controversial yet mundane,
Debra's messing with your brain.
Even Scientologists
Know there's more to all of this.
Search the ruins for trap doors,
Wonder what you're put here for.

Simple as a hint of gas,
Climbing nostrils as you pass,
Making Harvard graduates
Feel childish when they laugh at it.
Climb the rungs to kingdom come,
Sour Patch to acid tongue,
Are you opposed to having fun?
You clench the world between your buns.

You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)
You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)

Your life is always the post of something else,
Where is the present in the way that you present yourself?
It's disgusting how little that you try:
The existential equivalent of pink eye.

Drink alone and watch TV,
You're expecting harmonies
To tap your tune with silver spoons,
The anthem of impending doom,
Guiding Satan's steady hand,
Forcing Beatles to disband.
It's ego freaks and drama queens
The young at heart know what I mean.

You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)
You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)

You could do better,
Better than that,
You're a fraud.
Thank God and learn to keep your shirt on.
You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)

You'd burn so brightly
You'd burn so brightly in the dark.
You'd burn so brightly
You'd burn so
You'd burn so

You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)
You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)

You could do better,
Better than that,
You're a fraud.
Thank God and learn to keep your shirt on.
You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)
You could do better
You could do better
You could be the greatest man in the world (whoa)
We could do better
We could do better
We could be the greatest band in the world (whoa)
____________________________________

I find this song very inspiring...because we all can do better. Even if it's just a little more kindness, a touch more patience or holding the door open for someone--we all can do just a little better each day.

I like that it starts with "life is not a spark in space." It reminds me that we all have meaning, each of us was meant to be...and meant to be in this world.

I can do better.

Today I can do better than yesterday.

Tomorrow I will do better than today.

And if I don't do better one day...then I will the next.

I will not be the 'existential equivalent of pink eye.'

I will do better.

Strange Life

by Tickle Me Pink

I can hardly remember, the days when I felt free,
Never searching, 'cause it all made sense to me.
I will always remember, that point when I found out,
All my own plans may never come around.
Still we go on, never asking why...

I can feel this strange life, leading to a great life,
Where everything begins, where everything makes sense.
Somebody take this fake life, save me from this plain life,
So everything begins, so everything makes sense,
And nothing ever ends.

I went further to find her, then I ever thought I would.
Looking for answers she always said I could.
Then I knew something was missing, by the way she said my name,
But my own plans couldn't keep her, 'cause it doesn't work that way.
Still we go on, never asking why...

I can feel this strange life, leading to a great life,
Where everything begins, where everything makes sense.
Somebody take this fake life, save me from this plain life,
So everything begins, so everything makes sense.
If nothing ever is, I know some thing's got to give.

I can feel this strange life, leading to a great life,
Where everything begins, where everything makes sense.

I can feel this strange life, leading to a great life,
Where everything begins, where everything makes sense.
Somebody take this fake life, save me from this plain life,
So everything begins, so everything makes sense...
And nothing ever ends...
______________________________________________

I can feel the shift...I can feel this life I have lived, shifting into the life I will be living...

I can feel the skin of it shedding, like a snake who's outgrown his past...

I can feel all the strangeness leading to greatness...

How...I have no idea.

But I feel it...and it all is starting to make sense...and it doesn't have to end.

Bad Days...

The air is getting cooler...

The days are getting shorter...

The darkness comes earlier, and lingers longer...

There will be bad days.

Today was one of them.

I don't know how to explain it...I don't know how to change it. My mind starts racing so fast, and then it basically flatlines...so I can't think, I can't speak, I can't do anything except stare off into the distance.

It feels as though I am in another world...like I am a ghost that is separate from everyone and everything.

Tomorrow will be better.

Just This Once...

Today was a beautiful day, with sunshine and relaxation--excepting the Nerf Battle Birthday Party I went to.

I got to spend the day with Ryan, which is always great fun. We got to have a bit of a lazy Sunday, but still enjoy the outdoors! We went for a nice hike (after we visited Verizon, yet again--but they gave me a whole new phone, so hopefully it will work!) and got to rock jump up a creek for a while, which was amazing!

We also spent a good part of the weekend watching the 8th season of Scrubs. I haven't watched it in a good while--but I love that show!! And the last season (while pretty sad most of the time) was wonderful.

I loved the final moments of the final episode...and I can't help but dwell on JD's last sentiment...

"Who's to say my fantasies won't come true, just this once?"

Death and Dying...

This day makes me very pensive...for obvious reasons, and for not-so-obvious reasons.

In 2001, my Grandfather was in a hospice at this time, and my Dad and I had plane tickets to visit him at the end of the month. So a little more than 2 weeks after 9.11, I was on a plane.

So this day makes me think about death, and dying.

About how people die and why.

And why some people always seems to die so much sooner than we want them to.

Anger...

I am angry.

Very angry.

So, here it goes...

Over the past year and a half, I have had to battle several rumors started by my ex. I have also had to battle the identity I left behind in my divorce.

I HATE being referred to as "Lisa ex-Murray." That is not who I am. It KILLS me every time I hear it, and it makes me angry too. When someone refers to me in such a manner, not only does it bring up painful memories, but it also feels as though I am being judged...and it feels kind of degrading.

I am not "ex." That is not who I am. I have grown into a new person--use my rightful name, please.

So, not very long after I left my ex--and by that, I mean about a day or two later, I found out that people were being told that I left him because I was a lesbian, and so I was leaving him for another woman. My ex was well aware of my sexual orientation, and I did NOT leave him for a woman. I left him because of what he did to me and the fact that I knew our marriage was beyond repair.

I have friends who get asked by mutual friends if I'm "a lesbian now" or "yet." This makes me extremely angry, because it just points to the fact that my ex has told lies about the facts of the end of our marriage, just so he wouldn't look like a bad guy. It also tells me that he still cannot accept responsibility for his actions.

I would like to say (perhaps a tiny bit in retaliation) that it was not I who made the rule that "anything with someone of the same sex didn't count." That "rule," was not requested by me...but I accepted it.

I am angry.

I have done my best to let my ex live his life, to do my best to help him move on. And every now and then--all too often though--I hear these stories that steal away bits of my new life...and it pisses me off, quite frankly.

So, I have decided it's time to call him on it. He needs to be accountable for the lies and deceptions he has passed on about me. If he wants to play ball, I'm ready to hit it out of the ballpark.

I wish I weren't so angry...but I know the underlying reason I am angry is that for the first time...finally, he has made me wish that I never married him. He has pushed so far that I wish I had never met him. He has stolen all that was good, and crushed it underfoot.

I know that all that I have been through has made me the person that I am, but nonetheless--there is definitely a part--a big part of me--that wishes I never even knew his name.

I am angry.

But I am ready to change that, and to do what I need to in order to let my anger pass. And all I can do is call him on his lies, and know that I will continue to dwell in the truth as best as I possibly can.

The truth shall set me free....

Fourmile Canyon Fire...

It is intense...

I remember the Dude Fire way back when I lived in Arizona. I never knew if we were in danger--it idn't seem like we were, we just woke up with ashes on the toys we left outside and on the windshield of the car...

As the Fourmile Canyon Fire continues to burn, I continue to hope and pray for the families displaced by the fire. I can't imagine what it must be like to have to take only what will fit into your car with you, knowing that what you leave behind you may never see again.

They have evacuated part of Boulder, and have said that they may evacuate more...to me that seems so unreal. It's just one town over from us. It's where I used to work. So unreal...

I just hope that no one is injured or lost in the fire. I remember the firefighters we lost in the Dude Fire, and I hope we don't have any stories like that here.

Good luck to those evacuating, especially those families with pets. May you all get to go home safely very soon.

Love and Cuddles....

Tonight, is a lovely night.

The air is cool (but not yet too cold), the air is clear and fresh...I am sitting here writing as my babies are cuddled up on the bed. It is quite delightful.

One thing has been bothering me lately...about my babies. Well, about one of them...it seems that Sora has developed a kind of separation anxiety. He meows and meows any time I am not home, and even when I am just upstairs. It totally breaks my heart....

My vet had no new solutions to offer other than what I was already doing...so I am hoping to find something to point me in the right direction.

It's so heartbreaking to know he is so sad when I am gone. He is such a cute kid, and really a good one too...he doesn't cause too much trouble....

If you have any suggestions, or can refer me to anyone, that would be great.

Have a great day!!

Many of Horror

by Biffy Clyro

You say, "I love you boy,"
I know you lie.
I trust you all the same,
I don't know why.

'Cause when my back is turned,
My bruises shine.
Our broken fairy tale,
So hard to hide.

I still believe,
It's you and me 'til the end of time.

When we collide we come together,
If we don't we'll always be apart.
I'll take a bruise I know you're worth it,
When you hit me, hit me hard.

Sitting in a wishing hole,
Hoping it stays dry.
Feet cast in solid stone,
I've got Gilligan's eyes.

I still believe,
It's you and me 'til the end of time.

When we collide we come together
If we don't we'll always be apart.
I'll take a bruise I know you're worth it.
When you hit me, hit me hard.

Cause you said Love,
Was letting us go against what
Our future is for,
Many of horror.
Our future is for,
Many of horror.

I still believe,
It's you and me 'til the end of time.

When we collide we come together
If we don't well always be apart.
I'll take a bruise I know you're worth it.
When you hit me, hit me hard.
_____________________________

I want to start with a couple points before I get into the meat of this post:

1) I love this song.

2) I heart Biffy Clyro. If you haven't listened to them yet, DO IT. Click here. You won't regret it.

3) This is the post I was talking about that I have been working on. It has spent a lot of time in my head, and I think that it has finally been processed enough to make it into the world. This is the post that I have spent a lot of time thinking about how personal to get in all of this...so I am going out on a limb and saying a lot more than usual. Maybe.

OK, now that's done...here we go.

I feel this song, much like I do Mountains. Singing this is like exhaling part of my soul...

I could go through this line by line, and explain how each line touches me. But what has been bouncing around in my head is the bigger picture...

When my back is turned,
My bruises shine.
Our broken fairy tale,
So hard to hide...

...When we collide we come together,
If we don't we'll always be apart.
I'll take a bruise I know you're worth it,
When you hit me, hit me hard.

I kept getting the bruises. I kept taking them because I believed that it was worth it all...I wanted to believe that I was not being hurt on purpose. I wanted to believe that the person who was supposed to love me most in the world didn't want to hurt me like that. For me, it wasn't difficult to hide--hide myself, the pain, the chasm between.

I think the part I identify most with is the last line...When you hit me, hit me hard.

And this is where I start to wonder exactly what to write....

Passion.

If someone loves you, hates you, feels anything strongly for you--there is Passion. And that passion creates an energy in anything they do towards you.

I was in a marriage where I still don't know why he did some of the things he did. It fell apart slowly...then evaporated when there was nothing left that could be salvaged. How?

It was like...a slow dripping faucet. One that you don't realize is dripping until the sink is plugged and all of a sudden there's a flood on the floor. It was barely noticeable...to him anyway. I felt the distance like the chasm of a canyon, widened by eons of flowing rivers...

The first evidence something was really wrong was when he put alcohol in my drink at dinner, and then lied to me about it...3 times. You all know how I feel about alcohol, so I felt drugged and betrayed. I asked him why he did it...he couldn't tell me why. I still think he honestly doesn't know why he did it. He also couldn't tell me why he lied about it...I begged for therapy. He refused.

A few months later, around Thanksgiving, things were not getting better. I can't remember what lead to it, but we spent one night talking very late--and sometime around 2 or so, he told me that he never trusted me...he never believed that I would stay with him. Despite our vows...despite me never having given him any reason to believe otherwise. I asked him how long he had felt that way...since the wedding? No response. Since the engagement? No response. Since the beginning? Still no response...he had never trusted me. He never believed a word I said....he never believed all of my actions that pointed toward the love and care I had for him. Everything I said or did, echoed thoughtlessly in his head...and bounced right out. He readily admitted that he had no reason not to trust me, not to believe me. He couldn't tell me why...

At this point, I left. I stayed with my parents for a few days...and demanded therapy. I went back after he agreed, and picked a therapist. We went to some sessions, and I honestly can't remember them very well...

The holidays were rough. We put on our facade for friends and family...but we slept in different beds, on different floors of the house. We even did a good job of hiding everything during a vacation with my family...no one knew...

We kept up with therapy, and kept trying...but it wasn't easy. And I was trying as hard as I could to keep at it...

But there is always the straw that breaks the camel's back. And that came the night of my birthday party, ironically. And here is as far as I can be detailed and personal in this post.

When someone who is supposed to love you lays their hands on you in a way that is not loving, it is hard to accept. But when there is even a lack of passion in that moment, it is heart-wrenching.

(I was not hit or beaten in this incident. Just to be clear, it's just a parallel that works well in this instance.)

If it was going to be over, I wanted to know that he felt something about me. Love, hate, fear...anything. But there seemed to be nothing. I packed a suitcase...he never tried to stop me. Every step I took away, he stood in place. When I finally turned away, he still did nothing.

I took the bruises, I thought he was worth it.
But he never did the same for me.

I just wanted to know that I was loved...
That what I had been and done mattered...
But in the end...
I guess it didn't.

Our future would have been for many of horror.

Shopping, and lazy days....

Wow...it was so much fun to not have to work today!! I got to do some (window) shopping and lazing around instead.

It is interesting to be in the midst of a shift...where work was the focus of my life, where I thought that's where I wanted to be investing my time and energy...and into where living, love, laughter and family are my new focus. Contentment in my soul has become so much more important than contentment with my bank account or work hours.

So far, this way is so much more fulfilling. I found my cup to be filled, and it doesn't just drain away at the end of the day. Sure, some days it gets knocked around and some spills out, but there's always at least a little left at the beginning of each day...and most days, my cup just overflows!!

It has been difficult--it is difficult to find how to feel that same sense of accomplishment. But I am working on it...and I will get there. In the mean time, I plan on being happy and healthy. :-)

2...

Today I got to spend one last day at Water World!! it was absolutely wonderful, as it was also a celebration of 2 months of awesome adventureness with my man!

As you all know, I absolutely love Water World. And it is great to once again have great memories there. That's kind of the trick, isn't it? To create a new world within what already exists?

It was a perfect day. Abundant laughter, beautiful weather, hand holding and kisses. And even a ride down the Zoomerang on a single tube (SO AWESOME, by the way).

Thanks for joining me today Ryan--I had so much fun with you! Thanks for putting up with my endless rambling about my Water World, for being the perfect person to wait in line with, and the perfect person to share each ride with. I know 2 is just the start, but thanks for each moment of awesomeness. Whoo...Haaa....good God y'all!!! ;-)

3 C's...

Chinese food...
Cheesy Martial Arts movie...
Cuddling.

Awesome way to spend a Saturday night. :-)

Friday...

Yay for Friday!!!

I has been a long time since Friday has really meant anything besides just another day in the week. This holiday weekend, I actually don't have to work!!

I am super happy, super excited!! I can't remember the last time I didn't work through at least most of this weekend...

Happy weekend everyone!!

I Forgot...

...that the weather changes so much.

The cold and clouds today were a reminder of the winter that is to come.

A very real reminder.

Blogness...

So, I just found out that I can look at all my stats for my blog!! As in, how many views I get, from what countries, and even what posts are the most popular.

I was surprised by which were most popular--here are the top 10 (in order):

Moving Day...

I don't want to ride this roller coaster anymore...do I?

Life Less Ordinary

Sometimes Goodbye's the Only Way...

Sometimes All It Takes is a Walk Around the Lake...

Hold Me Closely...

Nothing Beats a First Kiss...

Hauntings...

Fear...

Confusion sets in...

Kind of interesting, isn't it?? I thought so. I think it's interesting which ones are in the top--most I understand, just because I have included music lyrics--so anyone searching for those songs have a chance of stumbling upon my blog. But I am very happy that my Moving Day blog is #1...and that some of my own poetry is on this list.

So, I am trying to focus on writing a book. I have had the idea in my head for the last year, and this blog has helped me figure out what I really want to write about. Now I just have to buckle down and get it done.

There are definitely going to be lag times in my postings--like I have had recently. But I will be writing every day, and I promise to do my best to post as often as possible.

So thank you all for your support!! Feel free to share my blog with anyone you think might find it entertaining or helpful.