Ugly Duckling

For those of you who didn't know me growing up, I wasn't pretty. I wasn't even cute. I was that unfortunately chubby, ugly duckling girl with a great personality....and brains. So...that's who I feel I still am. That unfortunately awkward girl who can change the oil in your car. In high heels. Who will wear pearls and talk to you about Star Wars.

Lately, I keep wondering what it is about me that seems to scare people off, or push them away. A friend of mine told me it was because I was too pretty. That is pretty incomprehensible to me, seeing as I am an ugly duckling. And it got me to thinking...

I am just a normal girl. Really. A very contradictory, relatively low-maintenance, average, every day, girl-next-door. I am pretty smart though.

So why do I feel like I intimidate people? Why do I feel like people are just too bashful to speak to me? I have tried smiling more...I am not sure if it is working.

I guess what I am getting at--in a very roundabout way, is that I wonder why I don't get asked out on dates, I wonder why guys just want to "hang out" and don't seem interested in being romantically involved with me.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. The ugly duckling is always "one of the guys."

But am I still one of the guys in 4 inch heels with fishnets and a short skirt?

Apparently....you can't change a leopard's spots...or an ugly duckling.