Yonderings....

My Grandfather wrote a series of books for us grandchildren--he called them "Grandpa Ray's Yonderin's." He and my Grandma painstakingly hole-punched, organized and color-coded books for each of us...mine was purple. I can't remember if I read it right away...but I remember that once I did start reading, I didn't want to stop.

They were simple stories--just little things about his life and growing up...and some big stories like how he met Grandma (my favorite.) There was something so captivating about his stories--something so deep yet accessible. 

All of us have a story to tell...and lately I have been feeling like it is time to try and regale others with my stories--but more importantly, I want to share the story of my Grandmother. 

I have had the pleasure of getting to be a part of my Grandmother's story over the past 28 years...but I know that I don't get the whole story. I am hoping that over the next few months I can help my Grandmother pen her own Yonderin's. 

I feel that her journey has informed my own, and that her stories will help enliven mine.

We all have our yonderin's...I just hope we all take the time to pass them on.

1,001 Things...

Lately, I feel as though there are 1,001 things pulling me in 1,001 directions. You ever feel that way?

There are not very many truly quiet moments--even as I sit here the laundry and dirty dishes are hollering to get done; I can hear the faint cry of the bathrooms needing to be cleaned; and Sora is never quiet. At least not lately...

Do you remember being a kid, and getting to enjoy moments? 

Laying in the grass staring at clouds...

Feeling the breeze blow past as the tree you've climbed sways lazily...

Skipping stones across the lake watching the ripples disappear...

Hiding quietly, watching wild rabbits hop right past you...

How often do we get to be still anymore? Of course, this thought crossed my mind this morning as I was driving home from work to pick up paperwork while mapping out my next destination. Everything is so *now.* There is no moment to think--to be pensive or thoughtful. If an idea pops into our heads, we have everything at our fingertips to execute everything *now.*

Where has the stillness gone? Where have the quiet moments of life left to? Where has our ability to disappear into the wilderness gone?

There is no time to be still...the quiet moments of thoughtfulness are easily interrupted by the ring of a phone or the necessity of "getting something done." There is always something to be done--another check mark off a list. But how often do we remember to be still...and know who we are?


The Mountains are calling,
And I must go--
How far they will take me,
I do not know.

In my mind winds a path,
Of little sense and rhyme;
Simply one of the wild
And a lost sense of time.

The sea is calling,
And I must go--
In its waves and torrents
I will bury all forgotten sorrow.

In my soul burns a fire,
Of a most passionate flame;
And despite every attempt,
This one they cannot tame.


The Mountains are calling,
And I must go--
Wherever they will lead me,
I will surely follow.


I will follow in the quiet stillness...to try and know what is this life...and who I am.
 

An Unusual Rhythm....

This post is for all of you who are so very sweetly concerned with how I am doing...so here's the whole story:

My Dad has a congenital heart syndrome (defect, differentness, whatever) called Wolff Parkinson White Syndrome. He had no idea he had it until he was in his 40s, and has since had it ablated twice.

About a year and a half ago, I started having weird stuff happen--I would all of a sudden feel absolutely beyond exhausted after "normal" exertion. There would be nothing I could do but lie down and wait for it to pass. I didn't think much of it until a few months ago, when these episodes started getting closer together and started involving more symptoms. I would get dizzy, short of breath, and my heart would race for no apparent reason. After chatting with my Dad, it seemed that I was having the same symptoms he had for WPW.

I kept telling myself that I would get in to see the doctor soon, but kept being too busy. But this past Wednesday, during a normal yoga workout I almost passed out. I could barely breathe, my heart was racing and the world started turning dark. I had to stop dead in my tracks to keep from passing out.

So, needless to say, I went to the doctor yesterday. I got an EKG and some blood tests to see what's up. The EKG looked normal, so they want me to be hooked up to an "event monitor:" a heart monitor that I wear for 2 weeks that will record times when I am having abnormal heart activity. 

And that is all I know for the moment. I am waiting for the call to go in and get set up with my awesome event monitor ( just like Barney!!), and I will know about my blood test results next week.

Hopefully, it's all something that can go away very easily. Until then, I'm not going to worry my little head over it...too much.

Thank you all for your concern! I will keep you posted on how everything is progressing.

Tucson...and the Unexpected...

Ryan and I got to spend a "long weekend" in Tucson last week...and I am already missing the desert warmth!

Ryan surprised me a couple months ago, saying that for my birthday we were going to go visit Grandma for a few days. It was the perfect gift!

As you all know, I love my Grandma very dearly--and I love my Tucson too. It was so much fun to finally get to take Ryan to see it all! We even got to spend Sunday at the Sonora Desert Museum...Ryan enjoyed all the snakes and reptiles--and javelinas too!

Every time I visit Tucson, I wish that I could live there. Honestly, Ryan and I are weighing the pros and cons of several places around the country that we could live. Seattle, Tucson, somewhere else in Colorado...all over the place. We know what we would like to do for work...so now we just have to figure out where we can do what we want to do.

I am always surprised with the curve balls life throws our way...even small unexpected incidents. Like, my biological Mom called me on my birthday. I believe that the last time we spoke was about a year and a half ago. She is doing well, and for that I am very grateful. She is a talker, and talked for about an hour as I did homework. I do think that our relationship is getting better, and she told me that she hopes that our relationship can be even better. I do too.

I am very glad that our biggest sale of the year at TCS is almost over...I am looking forward to having a little more free time to spend on school and projects. One of these days I will finally get the etsy store up and running. Oh, did I forget to mention that? Yeah, I am starting an etsy store--for hats, shirts, corsets...anything and everything I want to make! I have already made several hats, all I have to do is post pictures!

Well, I should get back to homework..or something. I finally finished my tattoos yesterday, and so typing is quite awkward...and I am sure that writing will be awkward too. Worth it, nonetheless.

I hope that life is full of joy and happiness for you! And I hope that the weather is warm (or to your taste!)

Baking, Crafting, Music and the Like...

Oh holidays...
I can't believe that Thanksgiving and Christmas have come and gone; and that it is now 2012! Where in the world did all the time go?!?

Lately, as I have been driving around here and there, I have been contemplating time. How it always passes at the same rate. A minute is a minute...a day is always 24 hours...a year is (leap years excluded) always 525,600 minutes.

Yet, it does not always seem that all minutes are created equal...not even all years seems equal. Relativity, I guess.

2011 was a great year. Sure, it has its up and downs...but it sure was good to us. Our year was packed full of adventure...

We moved in together last January (after getting engaged on Christmas 2010)...

I got my nose pierced in April...

We visited Roswell, NM--and various other oddities of NM...

Saw Biffy Clyro live in an awesomely small venue...

Had awesome engagement pictures taken (by Austyn Elizabeth Ford)...

I made my wedding dress in one month...

Had an amazing bridal shower/bachelor party...

GOT MARRIED!!! On my Grandparents' wedding anniversary...

Had a fun time at Boondocks afterward...

Honeymooned in the sand dunes and New Mexico...

Went yurting with the other Borgmanns and the Duncans...

We moved out of our tiny apartment into a lovely townhouse...

Expanded our family with the adoption of Kaylee Serenity...

Went on lovely summer and fall hikes...

Finally got to see Rocktin Grove play...

I discovered my love of baking...

Ryan discovered his love of sharp objects...

Halloween-ed with awesome friends...

We celebrated Ryan's birthday in style...

I began mentoring and volunteering...

Kairi and Sora kept watch over the house...

Kaylee enjoyed her first snow...

Ryan got a new tattoo...

We spent Christmas with our wonderful families...

And we enjoyed every minute of 2011 possible...

So, 2012--here we come. We have big expectations for you. 2011 was pretty epic, so you better not let it show you up.

Thanks friends, for reading! Be on the lookout for more fun stuff from the Borgmanns...because 2012 is the year of the RayBorg...it's a slight adjustment to the Chinese Zodiac calendar. ;-)

Happy New Year to you!!